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a finished sock

I got Judie’s first sock done last night and the second one started.  I was actually pretty productive at home.  I got the knitting done and the place tidied up, lunches and dinner made…  I just can’t seem to figure out how to be productive at work anymore.

I’m sure part of it is the disruptions during the day.  We’re coming into our busy season and that takes quite a bit out of me.  I taught on Monday and I’ll teach again on Friday.  Tomorrow is the stupid thing at the other campus.  I really don’t want to go.  We’re not even sure yet WHY we’re going, just that our boss wants us to.  I just have this terrible feeling that it’s going to be a complete waste of time.  I’ve got way too much stuff to do here to drive an hour south to spend the day fucking around.

I’m going to try to get back on track this morning.  My boss isn’t coming in until later so that means, hopefully, it’ll be a quiet morning.  I need to get working on testing a new system before we make the official upgrade next month.  Testing is not my favorite thing, but it needs to be done.

Things with Josh are alright I guess.  I really wish I could get through to him that with as bad as he’s hurt me lately, I’m not really in the mood for him.  He keeps telling me that he loves me and I keep wanting to call him a fucking liar.  The only reason I don’t is because I know it would start a big fight and I just don’t have the energy for that today.

The mood is alright.  I’m hanging out in the neutral place right now, which is ok I guess.  I’d like to go back to being in a really good mood like I was a few weeks ago, I’m just not entirely sure how to get there.  And I know the weekend coming up isn’t going to do anything to put me in a better mood.

I really do just fucking hate seeing that brat anymore.  It’s gotten to the point where I feel like Josh and I are just babysitters, taking her off the ex’s hands for the weekend so that she can go have fun.  Josh doesn’t interact with the brat like she’s his daughter anyway, so why should I be forced to deal with this shit?