So apparently if you’re sleep deprived long enough, your body starts doing all kinds of nifty things. Like making you eat a lot. And making you feel like you’re covered in bugs. And it won’t get better until you get some good sleep.
Shrinky-poo says I’m sleep deprived, and probably have been for several weeks, if not months, and that it’s brought on an episode of hypomania. This is scary. Hypomania can blossom into full on mania if left untreated. So treat it we shall.
She increased my Geodon by 20mg a night and said to do this until Monday. If I still feel like my brain is racing on Monday I’m supposed to call and she’ll increase it some more. I’ve got a week to get this under control before she has to do something drastic. Please, let’s not do something drastic.
Josh does not seem to be the least bit phased by this. I don’t know if it’s that he doesn’t care or just doesn’t realize how deadly serious this could become. All I know is that he’s not being supportive and I’m kind of pissed off.
I slept a little better last night. I know I laid down and turned the tv off around 9 and probably fell asleep shortly thereafter. I woke up at 2 something thinking I had to pee, but went back to sleep. I woke up again at 4:11 and did go pee. I didn’t wake up again until after 6, when I should have been in the shower. I made it to work about 15 minutes late, which is really no big deal. I’m thinking I might ask my boss to let me have the afternoon off so I can try to rest.
The upside of the hypomania is that I have an overabundance of energy and I’ve been getting stuff done. Work stuff not as much as home stuff, but I’m still managing to accomplish things. Last night at home I finished tearing apart and reconstructing the last area of our living space that was annoying me. It looks good. Now this weekend I’ve got a few chores to finish and then, hopefully, I can make some good progress on the next sock.
I wish I knew what to do about Josh. He doesn’t seem to take anything seriously, my health or his. I’ve told him this could easily land me in the hospital, but he doesn’t seem to believe me. And worse, he doesn’t seem to care.
The mood is pretty low right now, while the energy is still fairly high. I feel like my brain is just racing and my body can’t keep up with it. I’ve got all kinds of ideas for things I’d like to do, and some of them I follow through on. I just don’t really feel like I can concentrate on anything.