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halfway done
09 Thursday Aug 2012
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in09 Thursday Aug 2012
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09 Thursday Aug 2012
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inTags
bipolar disorder, life, love, mental illness, motivation, sleep, stress
I’m back at work this morning, but just to teach. I still feel utterly miserable. I slept quite a bit yesterday and then slept again last night and I still don’t really feel like I have any energy. And I’m really afraid today that I won’t be able to control my bowels and will have an accident. Not cool.
Josh and I managed to get along pretty well all day yesterday, which was really nice. He stayed at work and let me rest, which is what I needed. Today he’s being very sweet to me which always helps.
The mood is very unpleasant. I hate being sick and I know I’ve been a little crabby because of it. Not feeling well will do that to you. I just don’t feel like I have any energy or motivation to do anything and that frustrates the hell out of me. So does the feeling that I have an alien baby inside me just waiting to rip through my guts.
Right now I’m just waiting for my boss to come in so I can let her know what’s going on. She’s been out the last two days and doesn’t have the story yet. My co-worker told me that if she’s not here before I leave to teach she’ll let our boss know what’s going on. I’d just really rather talk to her myself.
I feel terrible about being sick while we’re so busy, but there really isn’t much I can do about it. With a virus you pretty well have to just rest and let the damn thing run its course. And we all know how hard it is for me to just rest.