Tags
bipolar disorder, family, knitting, life, love, meds, mental health, mental illness, recipes, sleep
I have an appointment with my shrinky-poo today. It’s a follow up from my last visit. I’m hoping it goes well and that she doesn’t feel the need to further fuck with my medications. I’m still not necessarily sleeping that great, but it’s better than it was.
I love my shrink. I think she’s the best psych doc that money can buy. She listens to me, asks questions that a therapist might, wants to know about anything going on in my life that might be affecting my mental well being, and she doesn’t pull any punches. When I’m fucking up, she tells me I’m fucking up. I really and truly love this woman.
My first shrink after being diagnosed was an asshat. All he wanted to do was keep me so medicated that I couldn’t possibly think about suicide. Keep in mind that when I was seeing him I hadn’t even attempted yet – I’d only talked about it. He had me on mega doses of Seroquel and I was barely able to function. I just sort of assumed that this was the way my life would be from then on. I had no idea that someone living with a mental health diagnosis was allowed to have any quality of life.
My mom finally went to an appointment with me and ripped him a new one. She said all the things to him that I had been afraid to and demanded that something change. He told her that this was as good as I’d ever be. She refused to believe that and we started looking for a new doc.
My therapist at the time gave me the recommendation. Even on my first appointment I knew that this was a better kind of treatment. I never looked back.
If there’s a lesson to be taken from all this it’s that you really don’t have to settle when it comes to your mental health care. If something doesn’t seem right about your doc, look for another one, even if only to get a second opinion. Your psych doc literally holds your life in their hands so you need to be able to trust that person completely. You need to know if your heart of hearts that s/he has your very best interests in their heart.
Trust me, in psych docs as in shoes, it’s worth it to shop around for the very best fit.
*****
This week is kind of unusual at home. My sister is traveling for her job again so my mom is staying at their house to help take care of the kids. On Saturday they leave for Florida for a week. This means Josh and I essentially have the house to ourselves for 2 whole weeks. I’m a little scared if I’m to be honest with y’all. It’s been a good many years since I’ve had responsibility for this much of a household. There’s all kinds of little things that my mom does that I’m afraid I take for granted. I’m sure we’ll be ok, it’s just a little nerve wracking.
Josh and I seem to be getting along fairly well. No fights yesterday and so far this morning has started off smooth. I got up with almost no problem this morning when he did and so I had time to do my usual morning stuff. It just seems to make me feel better to leave the house in the morning knowing that everything is cleaned up and that I won’t be coming home to any messes. Josh even kind of picked some of his stuff up this morning. I made a point of telling him last week that it’s easier for me to do these things when I have some kind of physical sign from him that he’s helping and he appreciates what I’m doing. It appears he listened and is starting to do his part. This makes me very happy.
I wasn’t really in the mood to work on the sock last night, but I did take some time yesterday afternoon at work to get in a few rounds. I’m guessing it shouldn’t be a problem to have it all done by Friday. I’ve got nothing on my calendar at work today so I’ll be taking my regular lunch and that means 30 – 60 minutes of knitting time, depending on when I get hungry. I think after this I’ll get back to working on Christmas presents. I need to figure out just how many of those washcloths I need to make and then I know I’ll be doing some hats. Not sure what to do for the kids this year, but I’m sure I’ll figure something out.
I do have another recipe I’m working on to share with y’all. It’s Peach Bread Pudding and I think it’s my favorite bread pudding recipe ever. I got the idea from a recipe Mom clipped from the newspaper, but I’ve modified the hell out of it. One night this week I’ll try to type it up and get it shared.
