Tags
anxiety, bipolar disorder, borderline personality disorder, life, limits, love, meds, mental health, mental illness, sleep
We fought again last night, pretty bad. Lots of yelling and name calling. I’m really tired of this shit. I feel like little more than an empty shell of a person.
It seems like every time I think things will get better they get worse. I just don’t seem capable of keeping my shit together for more than a few days at a time. I’m always looking for things to be mad at him about.
I just don’t know what to do anymore. I was so wound up from fighting last night that I barely slept again. I even tried taking one of his Ambien to see if it would help, but I guess the anxiety was too much and so it did nothing. I’ll head to the pharmacy when I get paid and get some Melatonin and see if that helps.
The mood is just utterly terrible right now. Everything he does hurts me it seems. And now I’m starting to physically hurt from the depression that seems to be setting in. I just can’t seem to win.
Sending you hugs.I wish I could say the right things to make this better, but as you know…venting is the first stage.you have done that. Can you do something away from the house for you? Library to look at magazines? Nice slice of cake somewhere? Take time out to spoil yourself and see if that helps a little.or failing that buy heaps of wool or a really expensive thing like I do..lol hope you feel better soon and the melatonin works.i just got some of that.
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