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Evil Socks, fait accompli
The socks are DONE!!! I finished the knitting last night and then wove the ends in this morning. I can honestly say I have never been more pleased to see the end of a project.
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So, the changes… I heard from a few folks and most of them said that sleep is the number one thing they would change. Gemma wants to change her med regime, and I can’t say as I blame her. She’s been dealing with all kinds of ick side effects lately. I had some side effects at the beginning of my treatment, but they seemed to mostly go away when I switched docs and shrinky-poo overhauled my meds. I do still have issues with the notorious lithium tremors now and again, but mostly only when I’m really good and frustrated with something.
Sleep, the always important and often elusive sleep. We seem to get either too much or too little, rarely landing in that “normal” middle zone. We don’t fall asleep easily, we don’t stay asleep, and when we do sleep it’s often plagued with nasty dreams that leave us feeling as though we haven’t slept at all. Oh yes, been there, done that.
I actually had a hell of a time getting to sleep last night. And I thought I’d been smart about my evening. Josh and I were getting along splendidly, I didn’t have a smoke after dinner, drank a milkshake (which often helps put me out) and took my Clonidine fairly early. And still I was awake at midnight wondering what in the hell had happened. I finally drifted off and then woke to Josh’s alarm at 4:30. I went upstairs and used the bathroom and then flopped down on the futon in the sun room. I passed out for almost 45 minutes. I woke again, had a smoke, and then woke Josh. I feel alright now, but I’m betting I go down early tonight.
The only thing I can think of that might have been causing me trouble was caffeine. I was drinking sweet tea and my milkshake was chocolate peanut butter. But caffeine doesn’t usually seem to upset me, so I don’t know. At any rate, I think tonight I’ll stick to lemon water just to be safe.
But seriously, what does it take to get a good night’s sleep? I try avoiding the stimulants that I know bother me, I don’t lay down right after eating, I try to avoid stimulating television, I get everything that needs to be done accomplished so I’m not worrying about leaving things unfinished, I keep the room very cool, and I run a fan for white noise. What the fuck else should I be doing? If anyone has any other tips or tricks that help, please, share them.
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Things in Mama’s world seem to be running pretty smoothly right now. Josh and I had a very minor upset yesterday afternoon that we resolved quickly and efficiently. The evening was grand. I got all of the chores done, we had a lovely meal together, I finished the socks, and I just plain felt GOOD. I’m back to working on the washcloths for Christmas and trying to figure out what to do for the other folks on my list.
I think I have my morning routine all figured out now. I get up either when Josh does or just a little before him, use the bathroom, smoke and drink my mocha. If it’s still way before he needs to get up I knit for a few minutes. I then put his lunch together, send him on his way, make the bed and tidy the basement, and knit again. When he gets to work we talk for a few minutes and then I start getting myself ready. Since I’ve been doing this I’ve been able to accomplish everything in the morning and get myself to work with at least a few minutes to spare. It works well and I really do like it.
This morning I’m waiting for the financial aid office at the community college Josh is enrolled in to open. I neglected to read all of their directions for applying for aid and now I have to fax them a release form. Except I can’t find the fucking fax number anywhere. Seriously, if they’re going to tell us we can fax something to them they ought to make it easy to find the damn number.
Josh is already telling me we’re going to have a good weekend. I’m actually looking forward to the weekend for a change. It’ll be just the two of us and I think I’m really going to enjoy that. Not sure yet what all we’re going to do, but we’ve got plenty of things we should be able to do. I’d really like to finally get working on that cedar chest now that the weather is more reasonable.
I’m having a serious debate with myself over the merits of continuing my Facebook account. Most of my “friends” don’t post personal things anymore. They repost political articles or religious pictures. This is fine, but I don’t share their views so I don’t necessarily enjoy seeing these things. And I kind of feel like only a very few of them are actually paying attention to the things I’m sharing. Josh suggested downloading all of my photos from there to make sure I don’t lose anything and then letting it sit for a few weeks. If, after that time, I haven’t missed it at all then I should deactivate it. I think this sounds like a very reasonable plan. While I’m working the lab on Friday I’ll take care of the pictures. I’m just really not sure Facebook is something I want to spend any more time on, ya know?
The mood lately has been LOVELY. I’ve felt very in control of my emotions, which is a pleasure. The minor upset yesterday was handled quite well I think. I’m looking forward to another good day and then an awesome weekend.