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Josh and I are fighting, what else is new…

There was talk of them working over time this week so I asked him how late he was staying today.  He hasn’t stayed any other days so far so I was curious.  He got kind of defensive and we started fighting.  It’s escalated, as usual.  Now he has his phone turned off and is ignoring me.  He claims to love me yet he’s acting like a child again.  I’m sick of it.

I feel like utter shit and I don’t need this today.  If Friday is bad the whole rest of the weekend is usually bad, especially if I don’t feel good.  So yeah, I have 2 more days of fighting to look forward to at the very least.  I don’t need this shit.  I deserve better.

The mood is shit.  I’m having a borderline episode AGAIN and there’s very little I can do about it.  I’m about to take a Klonipin and see if that helps.  Unfortunately there’s only so much that can be done without talking to him.  And of course I’m scheduled to be in that presentation when he’ll take his last break.  The only good thing about that is I’ll be able to ignore him this time.  Won’t that be lovely.

I hate him, I really honestly do.  The question is, will the hate be strong enough to get me to kick him out this time?