Let me start by saying that no kittens have actually been harmed.  I’ll admit that I’ve threatened, on more than one occasion, to turn Evie Cat into a pair of slippers, but I haven’t done it.  Yet.  She ever pukes on my pillow and all bets are off.

Mom and I went shopping Friday afternoon and ended up looking for shoes.  I love me some shoes.  I have pretty big feet – size 11 (that’s a 42 for you folks across the pond) and they’re wide and I have rather high arches.  This is good sized for a woman’s foot and, as such, it’s not generally easy for me to find cute shoes.  I almost never have the option of getting something inexpensive at the discount store.  For one, cheaply made shoes are not comfortable for my feet.  They tend to not have much, if anything, in the way of support, they’re not usually as wide as they claim to be (if you can even find a wide), and they pinch somewhere – inevitably.

So this leaves me with buying expensive shoes.  And this is fine.  In the summer I live in sandals – Birkenstocks, almost exclusively.  For our trip to Florida last year I got a pair of Tevas that I find I really enjoy.  They’re a bit more casual and rugged, which is nice sometimes.  In the colder weather I wear Birkenstock clogs or men’s cowboy boots most often.

It’s not uncommon for me to drop $150 for a single pair of shoes.  Lest you freak out about that you should know that I have a pair of Birks that I got 15 years ago that I’m still wearing.  When they last that long and you figure that the total cost is spread out over that span of time, they’re really not very expensive at all.

So we’re at the shop that sells the Birkenstocks and other high end sandals and a line of shoes called SAS.  My grandmother had large difficult feet like me and wore their shoes exclusively.  They’re made in San Antonio, TX and they also last damn near forever.  The reason I haven’t worn them previously is that they always seemed to cater to folks like my grandma – nice OLD people.  But their shop carries my stuff, so I go and look.

None of the Birks they had out really appealed to me.  They were fine, just nothing so awesome that I had to take them home.  I went over to where Mom was and started looking at the other brands.  The pair of SAS sandals she had on caught my eye.  Three straps across with a strip of leather up the center accented with small flower details.  Quite nice.  And yes, they had them in black (snake skin!!!) and in my size.  SOLD.


Josh still doesn’t know how much I paid for them, and god willing, he never will.  But these shoes will last.  They were made in America, at least partly by hand, and they are so incredibly fucking comfortable.  It really does kind of feel like walking on kittens.

Now, does anyone really give a flying sack of squirrel testes?  No?  Yeah, didn’t think so.