I went home and tried to just play it like everything was fine. We talked for a few minutes, opened yet another bill from some old debtor who’s finally tracked him down and wants another $400, you now – typical stuff for us. He asked me if I wanted to have sex. I said I honestly didn’t care either way. He said lets.
That didn’t go well.
We ended up talking for a little while longer. Wait, no – I talked and he did his best to ignore me. Wouldn’t look at me, wouldn’t hardly say anything, and when he finally did he was incredibly rude and loud. Not sure why, but I kept trying to get through to him.
I really have come to realize that he is really just a small child trapped in a grown man’s body. He doesn’t know how to handle relationships properly, he doesn’t know how to look after himself, he has no business trying to manage money. And I’m really sick and tired of trying to do all these things for him.
But for whatever reason I got us talked back around to the point where things seemed alright and we did have sex. Things continued to be alright for a short while and then he was back to saying next to nothing and keeping his head in his Nook. Delightful evening really. Were it not for my mom being there I’d have essentially been all alone.
So this morning we get up and again I try to play this all off like no big deal. He leaves and I finish getting my bits together. He’s left the door wide open yet again – 5th time this week. I get in the car and head for the gas station to fill up and get snacks. He had offered at one point last night to get gas for me but then never followed through with it. So I do my thing and as soon as I get back to the car he starts texting me. He always sends one to let me know he’s made it there, but for awhile now it’s evolved into full blown conversations before he has to go into work. Only the problem is, even if we both leave the house at the same time it takes me longer to get here, so part of the time he wants to talk I’m behind the wheel of a vehicle. Totally not safe.
So I’m driving and doing my best to keep him from getting all pissy with me and keep the jeep between the lines. I get to where I need to turn on to campus and the phone goes off yet again. As I’m reaching for it, I see a jogger out of the corner of my eye. I really should have been able to see him as he was wearing a very neon shirt, but he was jogging pretty fast. I probably got about 5 feet from him.
Can you say “panic attack?”
And Josh just keeps talking and wanting to know what’s wrong. Seriously dude, just fucking leave me alone. I have well and truly had just as much of your shit as I can really tolerate in one day and it’s not even 8am yet. Nicely done.