It’s been a ridiculous week. I was at the southern campus all day yesterday for a dumb ass meeting. The chairs were bad, the food was awful, and I carpooled with the Toad so I couldn’t even smoke on the drive. I’ve got something that looks suspiciously like diaper rash under my boob and it itches like flaming hell. My right foot feels like there’s a rock in the same exact place in every damn shoe I own, but there’s nothing in any of them. My jaw hurts from something. I taught a class this morning that was new to me and had explosive poops up until about 30 minutes before it started. I have to prepare for a talk tomorrow at noon. I need to make a video for Monday night’s class. The brat is coming over this weekend. My roots are awful and I look older than old right now. I’m tired and I need a nap.
And my darling pals are no better off than I and I’m worried about all of you so much it hurts my heart. We need chocolate and tequila and muscular young men who give gentle massages and tell us we’re witty and beautiful and ask nothing in return. If I find a way to provide that for all of us, y’all will be the first to know.