a brief update that has nothing to do with underwear (or maybe it will)

Tags

anxiety, bipolar disorder, family, kids, life, limits, love, meds, mental health, mental illness, school, stress, the world is full of fucking idiots, work

Life has been… Damn, what’s the word I’m looking for? Wait, maybe it’s not a single word, maybe it’s a phrase. Yes, let’s see…

Unbelievably, undeniably, bat-shit, weird-ass, fucked up and then some, off the chain, ridiculously NOT GOOD

(well maybe a tiny bit good, but not much)

That’s me, as a squirrel. I put the finishing touches on a big project I’d been working on over the weekend and she was part of it. Josh drew her and I did the color on the computer after scanning his sketch. This is was an entirely personal project so there was no external pressure, but it was something I really wanted to do and that brought me a ridiculous amount of joy.

I also finished my individual school project, which made me feel quite nice. I’ve got just about everything I can do done for the group project, but that fucking slacker of a partner I have hasn’t done much at all. I’ll be kicking him in the teeth tonight.

So those were the good bits of the last several days, now for the bitching…

We had the brat this weekend. Josh decided to take her out on a few errands to give me time to finish my homework. That was lovely. Saturday night they were both camped out on the bed and got pissy when I told them I was tired and needed to go to sleep. Pretty typical. Josh still hasn’t told her what’s going on and doesn’t seem the least bit inclined to. Whatever.

On Sunday we went to Olive Garden with his dad’s family. That consists of his dad, his step-mom, a half brother and a half sister (both in their early 20s), and an adopted brother and sister – ages 13 and 11. The adopted brother has childhood onset schizophrenia and his meds are nowhere near stable yet. He’s been in several different residential treatment facilities that he keeps getting kicked out of for – wait for it – SENDING THE STAFF TO THE ER. He’s a dangerous little fuck. And the adopted sister has no manners. At one point she had a drinking straw UP HER NOSE and then proceeded to eat cake with it. (yes, the boogery end… did I mention she’s ELEVEN?)

No, I swear to all that is holy I am NOT MAKING THIS SHIT UP.

So, the plan before we got there was to go back to his dad’s house after dinner for dessert. However, they told the waiter it was Josh’s birthday and the poor bastard got a cake with candles and singing, which is really quite a harsh thing to do to a man who hates his own birthday. Plus, the Seroquel kicked in with a vengeance and he was fading fast. The brat had said something about wanting to go to their house to play with her “aunt” (the 11 year old adopted sister with the straw up her nose) but when we went to leave couldn’t be bothered to open her fucking mouth and say anything about it.

So we took her home where allegedly she proceeded to cry uncontrollably. She’s 11. She lives less than 15 minutes from them and could go over there any time. But Josh is a total fucking bastard for being so mean to her, according to his delightful ex wife. So what’s he do?

That sonofabitch apologized to his ex. Not to his kid, but to his ex. My opinion is that he didn’t owe either of them an apology, but what the fuck do I know.

But wait, it keeps getting better…

I’m up for a new computer at work this year, it’s finally my turn. This boat anchor is the one I’ve had since I started this position back in 2007. We’ve replaced the hard drive once already. I’m pretty sure it’s about to shit on me again. I’ve done every single diagnostic thing I know to do to the fucking thing. My boss finally got in touch with the guy who does the ordering and told him that I need something NOW. But this means I haven’t been able to do much of anything for the last 3 days.

So yeah, welcome to my little corner of hell…

The good news is, Josh and I are getting along pretty well. Well, since I yelled at him Sunday night anyway. But that totally counts.