Tags
bipolar disorder, blog for mental health 2015, borderline personality disorder, DBT, depression, mental health, mental illness, rebuilding my life, suicide
…freeze those fuckers and throw them at people you don’t like. Because seriously, who likes lemonade? But I digress, today is Thursday and on Thursdays we talk about mental health.
***TRIGGER WARNING***
I’m going to discuss suicide in this post. If that will bother you, stop reading now.
Something really cool happened yesterday. It’s probably only cool to me, but hey, my blog. This story actually starts back in 2010. Let’s hop in Mama’s time machine…
In February of 2010 I had a terrible breakup with a guy. That was pretty typical for me. I still hadn’t completed DBT and I wasn’t really taking care of myself. True to form I fell hard and scared him off. When he broke up with me I emptied the contents of the medicine cabinet into my stomach. That was my 4th serious attempt within two years. By the time I was found I was completely unconscious. The paramedics rushed me to the hospital, they pumped my stomach, and I spent time in the ICU.
Life was not good at that point, to say the very least.
I worked hard to get my life back together. I continued going to my therapy sessions, 3 times a week at the start, my mom locked my meds up and I only got one week worth at a time, and I learned how to think all over again. My psychiatrist wasn’t sure if I’d finally managed to cause myself permanent brain damage. (I hadn’t.)
Slowly but surely things came back together. I finished my Master’s degree and started doing better at work. My relationships improved. I learned how to not give up on myself anymore.
Back to the present…
A month or so ago my boss told me that our prescription insurance will do mail order three month med refills on generics for NOTHING. I take three prescriptions, all psych meds, and all generic. But I was concerned that my doc wouldn’t go for it because of my history.
The box came yesterday.
I wish you the power to be tough every day and every night… to hell with all the lemons, not even the duck who walked upt to the lemonade stand wants them…
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you sweetie, I wish the same for you. ❤
LikeLike
You’ve come a long way baby! ❤
LikeLiked by 1 person
Indeed I have. 🙂 ❤
LikeLiked by 1 person
I’m glad you’re still here and talking about it.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanks hun, I’m glad you’re still here, too.
LikeLike
That’s a big responsibility but you know what to do if you think things are going sour. You are handling life better all the time now. I never thought about freezing lemons and throwing them at people. Could be a plan.
LikeLiked by 1 person
I like having a back up plan at the very least. 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
huggity hug hug hug. you know we love ya and you are one tough cookie in a world of lemony lemons.
(sorry…weird mood…but you get my drift I hope)
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanks sweetie, I do indeed get the drift. 🙂 ❤
LikeLike
You rock, girlie!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanks, so do you!
LikeLike
Good on the meds and I like the new site.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanks! I’m not sure if I’m totally happy with it yet, but, like me, this thing is a work in progress. 🙂
LikeLike
Isn’t it nice to look back and say feck you past, look how good I’m doing. You should be very proud! I’m proud of you 🙂
Loving the new look by the way.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanks! I really kind of hate the banner, but it was something. 🙂
LikeLike
I liked the banner lol it was the first thing I noticed.
LikeLike
And THAT is one hellova testament to how friggin’ far you’ve come!
As weird as it may seem to some to celebrate getting medication in the mail, CONGRATS!!!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanks! It’s weird what we get excited about, isn’t it? Now my problem is figuring out where to stash 9 large bottles of pills! 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
It’s so easy to say that life sucKS. I have no words for you as I struggle to remain afloat. All I can say is that it’s nice meeting people who get it.
LikeLike
I wanted to 1st thank you for visiting my blog. I thought I would share the love and visit yours- and you know what? This is a terrific post! People have NO idea how daunting the recovery and treatment process is for those in the “trenches” this is such great news! I hope you still get your meds in 3 mos supply by mail. Taking one daunting task and making it easier for YOU.
Awesome self care options here would be to take the time you have had to use in the past to do something fun for you, instead!
Wishing you ALL the very best in wellness.
LikeLike