so much to tell, so little time to tell it

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Evie Cat, family, friends, nano poblano, team pepper, the kid

Do you see that? No room for Mama on her own damn bed. Lousy little ingrates.

I’m way behind schedule right now since I kind of slept in. I had thought I’d be able to get all the way through catching up on blog reading and comments and what not, but I really probably should think about showering and breakfast and stuff as I’ve got a busy day ahead. Josh’s daughter comes over this weekend and my BFF is going to come up with her daughter, who is just slightly older than the kid, we’re going to have lunch and then go thrift store shopping. Tonight I think Josh is dragging us to his dad’s house, though I don’t know that for sure. And I still have homework to do, and laundry, and other housework.

A mama’s work is just never done.

this isn’t photoshopped, I shit you not

Tags

Evie Cat, random shit that falls out of my brain

Evie Cat utterly hates having her picture taken. Most of the time I have to be super stealthy, or she has to be unconscious, for me to get a decent shot. But tonight while we were making a second dinner (that is a long and sorry ass story, wherein I fuck up food in the crock pot) she got her fluffy little ass up on the table and we got this little selfie with my phone. That cat has the most striking facial markings. Anyway, I think it looks ‘shopped because of the way her head and mine are kind of overlapped a little. And I am that annoying cat mom that likes to post random shots of her baby. So there ya go.

progress, ah yes, beautiful progress

Tags

Evie Cat, knitting, life, love, moods, motivation, projects, random shit that falls out of my brain, school, stress, the world is full of fucking idiots, work

I have been a woman on a mission lately, hence the “guest” post from Evie Cat yesterday. We’re still fucking around with the car accident mess and the douchenozzle’s insurance company is giving me the run around, so we only have one vehicle. This means I’m riding to work with Mom and getting here at 6:30am. I don’t mind actually, it gives me more time to get stuff done before anyone else arrives. Tonight has the potential for being interesting as Josh has school and doesn’t have time to pick me up and make it there on time, so I’m going to see if one of the gals I work with, who lives in the neighborhood next to ours, can take me home tonight. If not, I’ll wait here at the office until 6 when Mom can get me. And I don’t mind that either because I have the stuff I need to do homework with me and a knitting project.

Last night I spent about 2 hours working on jewelry/care package projects. I’m still working out a few of the details, but I’m making progress so that’s good. I want to have everything done when I get paid again next week so that I can get everything sent off.

I’ve also been rocking it at work. I got totally caught up with my email and voice mail messages yesterday, I got 3 posts written for our blog, got my office cleaned back up, started lining up dates and times for my spring training classes and got the registration links setup, and printed some materials so I can write more blog posts. Mama is a busy girl.

I’ll be able to enroll for the Spring semester on November 4, so I started looking for a class yesterday. Fortunately I’m to the point where the Wicked Bitch prof won’t be required. I found two that are listed as approved electives that sound really interesting. The best part is that I’d be home by 6pm.

That’s about all I know for now. I have one thing left from yesterday that I didn’t get done that I want to – assembling the star lamp that I picked up at Ikea. It frightens me that it came in a flat box. Hopefully I can do this without killing myself.

play time with Evie Cat

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Evie Cat

Hey folks, Evie Cat here.

I’ve been busy punishing Mama for being gone too long. I mean seriously, I had to drink warm water and my cup ran low. AND, I could see the bottom of my kibble dish. It was like living outside or something.

I’ve grown accustomed to certain amenities, you know. I have needs, I’ll admit it. It’s hard being this cute.

And it’s not like I ask a whole lot. I want my box cleaned twice a day, the kibble bowl to always be full, something fluffy to sleep on (actually, lots of fluffy things to sleep on), some toys, and that goddamn water glass to always be full and cold. Maybe something unusual now and then to play with…

Dad started getting boxes of stuff today, which of course means I got new stuff to play with.

MAMA!!!

And you wonder why I puke on the bed all the time…

 

strange observations

Tags

anxiety, Evie Cat, life, moods, motivation, random shit that falls out of my brain, sick, skin conditions, sleep, stress

Since I’ve been home sick I’ve made some interesting observations that I thought I’d share, mainly because I’ve been home sick for going on a week now and I really don’t have much else to write about.

First though, a wee update.

I did get in touch with the doc’s office yesterday FINALLY. I never did really get any kind of information on what she thinks this has blossomed into, but she called out an antibiotic and told me that I should consider myself contagious until I’ve gone a solid 24 hours with no fever. Given that the fever was what prompted me to call yesterday morning, I’m at home again today. But I am starting to feel better. Tired, really fucking tired, but better.

As if this virus mess wasn’t enough fun, I’m having issues with my skin on my other leg now. I’m not really sure what’s going on as it doesn’t feel like the usual mess, but it’s kind of uncomfortable. I’ve been doing the things the dermatologist said to do and I’m hoping the antibiotic from the GP will help, too. Because really, something else hurting is just what I need right now.

Ok, on to the observations…

Daytime television SUCKS. I haven’t been able to concentrate a whole lot on anything so I’ve spent more time with the tube this last week than I have in the last few years. We have a ridiculous cable package and I still can hardly find anything worth watching. Thank gawd for the DVR.

Evie Cat will sort of snuggle me and be friendly, but pretty well only if Josh isn’t home. I was pretty bummed out last night and she curled up by me on the bed for awhile and purred for all she was worth. As soon as Josh came home from school she wanted nothing to do with me.

When I get sick I turn into a world class slob. The living area down here is so bad that I really don’t even want Mom coming in. It’s not really filthy or dirty, it’s just messy as hell. There’s shit strewn on every flat surface. It’s kind of making me crazy. If I feel well enough today I might have to tackle it.

I honestly don’t remember the last time I was this sick for this long. It’s not uncommon for me to get bronchitis once a year and a cold here and there, but this shit has been ridiculous. I really think the last time I missed this much work due to an illness was when I had to take the 6 weeks off for my hysterectomy.

 

so this is what “resting” is like

Tags

Evie Cat, motivation, sick, sleep, work

I’ve done damn near nothing the last 4 days. Mom and I went for mani-pedis yesterday morning and then ran a very few brief errands. I’ve spent most of my time on the couch or in bed. Yesterday Mom made an amazing batch of Pumpkin Rice Pudding for me.

And she’s taken to calling me Soft Kitty. Sadly, Evie Cat hasn’t snuggled me at all. She’s quite happy to walk around on my pillow when I’m trying to sleep, but that’s about it.

Josh and I did some Nanoblocks yesterday.

I made the hummingbird and he made the guitar. If you haven’t seen these they’re like Legos but super tiny, and just a little frustrating at times. But they only took about an hour and it was something we could do together at the dining room table while watching Property Brothers.

I’ve slept more this weekend than I normally would in a week. I slept in this morning, got up for breakfast, and went right back to bed until lunch. Between lunch and dinner tonight I hung out in bed just watching tv. I feel like a slug.

I haven’t driven since Thursday morning, I didn’t leave the house today at all, I’m still smoking the same pack of cigs that I started on like Wednesday, and I haven’t smoked today at all. The really sad part is that I’m still not sure if I’m going back to work in the morning or not. I’ve still had a fever off and on today. If I am still feeling like shit I’ll be calling to see if I can get back in to see the doc. I definitely don’t want this turning into pneumonia and ruining our vacation next weekend.

let me bring you up to speed

Tags

bipolar disorder, Evie Cat, life, meds, mental health, mental illness, motivation, random shit that falls out of my brain, school, sick, sleep, work

Basically it’s like this – I’m still not dead and I’m still wishing I was. The sinus headache now extends down into my teeth. And my eyes are watering.

I’ve already warned the team at work that I almost certainly won’t be coming in tomorrow. I suspect that this nonsense will just get worse over night, in which case I’ll be hauling what’s left of myself in to see the doctor tomorrow. I can’t let something icky move in to my head and lungs and make it so I can’t go to Minneapolis later this month.

I met with a classmate today for lunch and was kind of surprised to find that she’s not any more confident about her performance in this class than I am. She actually admitted that she’s been going in to see the prof during her office hours on a pretty regular basis. That made me feel better. And really, this gal is just so nice. She was encouraging me to stay in the class so that hopefully we can be in the same group when that part comes up. The group shit is going to be torture again – this time there a whole 8 of us in the class. I’m still fairly confused about what’s going on. The assignment I turned in on Sunday, the one I shared with y’all about the description of the basement, I got all of the points on and she didn’t feel it necessary to leave any shitty feedback on it.

At any rate, I’m going to try to relax tonight. Josh just left a few minutes ago for school and Mom isn’t home yet. I’m hoping I can camp out on the sofa and just die in peace. I’ve told Josh that when I go he needs to have me cremated and then put me in the litter box. That damn cat insists on shitting on everything I love anyway.

friday feels

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Evie Cat, friends, kids, life, limits, moods, motivation, projects, random shit that falls out of my brain, work

Wow, that was quite the week. I’m glad it’s over and I am really hoping that the weekend turns out better. Sweet christ on a cracker, it’s got to be better…

I went in for my monthly haircut yesterday. Yes, I said monthly. At the end of every month, when payday rolls around, I go see my hairdresser for at least a trim and to get my eyebrows waxed. It’s one of the few “girly” habits I have. Lately I’ve been getting my color touched up every other month, but only because I prefer my silver in my jewelry, not my hair.

Anyway, I’ve been pissed with my hair lately. It had no shape, it was really curly in some spots and not at all in others, and just kind of made me feel old. I had 1990s hair, and I hated it.

I told her this yesterday and she took a ton of weight out of the back and sides. I have easily enough hair for 3 people anyway, so it’s not like you can really tell. And I have no fucking clue where all of these curls come from. My hair was completely stick straight until after I started taking Lithium, but shrinky-poo swears it’s not her fault.

At any rate, it’s better, much better. It’s coming up on 8:30pm here now and I still have it down. Normally I would have pulled it back in a messy bun as soon as my last appointment of the day was done. But this, this is really kind of pretty.

Do I actually think anyone gives a shit? Not really. But I don’t have much else to write about at the moment. Evie has yet another new perch, Sissy was playing with a rubber band earlier, and I have almost all of the housework done already. So yeah, here’s a picture of my hair….

Gawd I hate taking selfies

Work today was decent. I had time for a nice chat with my boss, I got some progress made on a project I’ve been trying to put behind me for awhile now, and we ordered in good lunch. Plus on Fridays I always leave a little early, so bonus. This is Josh’s weekend to get his daughter and I’m not sure yet what we’ll do with her.

Thank you again to all of you who have been offering kind words of encouragement lately. It means a lot to me knowing I have such amazing friends in all of you.

annoyed

Tags

anxiety, Evie Cat, life, mental health, mental illness, motivation, school, skin conditions, stress, the world is full of fucking idiots

I’ve been wearing that look ^ most of the day. Here’s my whiny ass list of excuses…

• I’m exhausted. Josh got home late and accidentally woke me up at 12:30am on his way back from a snack raid.
• I hurt. Evidently since my brain knows I have a dermatologist appointment scheduled my body has decided to put production of “shitty ouchie things” into high gear. They’re spreading into Very Unpleasant places. Can’t even adjust my undies without making myself wince.
• Hurting and being otherwise generally miserable is making me crave comfort food (read:  M&Ms, ice cream, peanut butter – and really, all 3 at once would be just SUPER) which is making me wildly embarrassed about how much garbage is going in my mouth so I’m not tracking it all. Because I suck.
• I have homework to do. Josh is doing his homework tonight because it’s the only time he has. I should do mine, too. BUT I DON’T WANNA!!!
• We had potstickers and eggrolls for dinner, which is two foods that contain cabbage. I love cabbage. You really don’t want to be within a 10 mile radius of me when I eat cabbage. Oh well, I never really liked Evie Cat anyway.

On the plus side…

• Last night I uploaded larger images of the stuff I have in my Redbubble store so that they’re available on a larger selection of shit. Please, go buy something.
• I have very little homework this week. The prof is traveling this week and I guess since she’ll be behind in grading, we don’t have much of anything to do. That applies to next week as well. The real bonus is that I should be able to work ahead.
• I had a nice session with T-Bone this afternoon. Always lovely having a chat with him.
• I figured out where the dermatologist’s office is. It’s on the way from work to where shrinky-poo and T-Bone are. Oh, and it’s right next to a fucking mortuary.
• I got my drawing for the Cartoon Craziness Challenge started the other night and it’s looking decent. At Josh’s insistence I’ve moved into a larger sketch book, and I have to admit, having more room is coming in handy for this one.

And yes, yes I used that phrase as often as possible today. You should try it, it’s fun.

a bit of an update

Tags

anxiety, Evie Cat, family, friends, kids, life, limits, love, mental illness, moods, motivation, school, skin conditions, stress

This is Josh’s weekend to have his daughter. She’s a good kid, but she’s 11, and she likes to talk. No, wait, what I meant to say is that the only time she fucking shuts up is when there’s food in her mouth or when she’s sleeping. It’s killing me. And she told me yesterday that she likes hanging out with me more than her dad because I talk to her (more like listen appropriately) and I’m not always messing with my phone.

So anyway, I managed to get my homework done finally and we got some of the stuff done around the house. To his credit, Josh cooked lunch and dinner yesterday with only a little bit of help. And the help was only because he isn’t as confident of his cooking skills as he probably should be. He’s a good cook.

Mom and the kid and I ran some errands in the afternoon, and after we got home I knew that I made the right decision about not going to see Phantom. We were gone for about 2 hours total and my legs were killing me. They actually started draining so bad that Mom could see the gunk on my pants. Nice.

 

And now I think it’s time to revisit something I haven’t done in awhile…

This week I was thankful for:

• Mom encouraging me to see her doctor who is way more amazing than the doctor I normally see. I finally got the referral I needed for a dermatologist.
• Mom and Josh putting up with me mostly being a whiny little bitch.
• F being completely understanding when I bailed on the Phantom trip. She is truly a BFF.
• Evie Cat letting me train her to beg for treats.
• Y’all leaving me such nice comments. That really helped cheer me up.
• Mom making me watch Dancing with the Stars with her Monday night after I had my meltdown about the “failed” assignment. I got to see Tommy Chong in a green pimp suit dance to Drop it Like It’s Hot. Priceless.