It’s Sunday morning, I’m feeling kind of spunky, so let’s talk about one of the topics that seems to always start shit…
I want to start by saying that I completely acknowledge that we are all different people with different needs and beliefs and that what makes sense to me may well seem like total bullshit to you. I don’t condone attacking anyone for their beliefs. EVER. I much prefer open and honest discourse.
So, let’s get right down to it…
I was raised Methodist, which is, in my opinion, one of the most laid back of all the organized Christian sects. We went to church most Sundays when I was younger, I was confirmed in the church when I was 13 (I think), and I spent a good deal of time involved with the youth programs. There were bits of the doctrine that I wasn’t totally on board with, but for the most part it was alright.
And then I was told that it was expected of me to submit a percentage of my paycheck to the church in support of their programs.
I was a teenager working a part time job, paying for my own car and several other bills, and giving them at least 4 hours of my time every work – 4 hours that I could have been at work. When I sent them a shitty letter about their “expectations,” I was asked to come in for a meeting with one of the ministers. I was told that it was my “Christian duty” to support the church financially. I told that minister what he could do with his Christian duty and left.
He was one greedy man, yes. He did not represent the entire Methodist system, yes. But that exchange left enough of an impression on me that I made a very conscious decision to not affiliate myself with Christianity. And honestly, I still don’t.
When I tell people that, particularly devout Christians, they tend to get very defensive – “well then, what do you believe?” That’s easy. I believe in The Church of the Snowflake.
We recognize that every person is a unique individual and is allowed to hold whatever beliefs seem right to her/him. The only rule is that while you’re practicing your preferred beliefs you need to BE NICE. You want to pray to the Christian God? Great, just be nice. You want to honor the Sabbath? Terrific, be nice to the people you meet there. You want to orient yourself in a specific direction and send your prayers to a place you think is really special? That’s awesome, just be nice while you do it. Don’t push your beliefs on others, don’t belittle their beliefs, and above all, BE NICE. Don’t send me your money, we don’t do that here. Just be nice, as often as you can to as many people as you can. BE NICE.
This is something I came up with in response to some particularly pushy Christians. And please don’t think I’m saying all Christians are pushy or bad people. My mom is probably the very best example of a Christian I’ve ever known and she is neither pushy nor bad. But a lot of people seem to think that they’re RIGHT which makes everyone else WRONG and when it comes to what you believe about something like religion, there is no such thing.
Just as valid as Mormons or Jehovah’s Witnesses if you ask me
There’s plenty of room for all of us to believe what we want and practice those beliefs in the way we want – provided we don’t infringe on the rights of others. And that’s the thing, what you want to do should never make it so that I’m not able to do what I want to do provided that neither of us is hurting other people.
In my book, that also applies to driving while intoxicated. You want to get drunk off your ass, that is super – do not even think about getting behind the wheel of a vehicle. But I digress…
People have been twisting and corrupting the teachings of these wonderful men for years and years.
And what just absolutely infuriates me are the “Sunday Christians,” the ones who seem to think that all they need to do is go to church, throw a $20 in the offering plate, and that magically makes them Good Christians – even though they talk shit about other people or cheat on their spouses, beat their kids, and don’t do a single decent thing the rest of the week. I’ve got news for you fucks –
Hanging out in church for a few hours on a Sunday morning doesn’t make you a Good Christian any more than hanging out in the garage for a few hours on a Sunday morning is going to make me a Chevy Impala. It just doesn’t fucking work like that.
Amen. Praise Jesus and pass the ammunition.