time for some ranting

Not all that long ago I went and saw the Very Nice Dermatologist. She gave me some suggestions for things to do to help my skin condition and said that if things didn’t get better I needed to call and come back. Fair enough.

This morning in the shower it looked like a motherfucking slasher movie, there was that much blood draining from yet another open area on my leg.

So this afternoon, after dealing with the insurance/busted car/my husband is an asshole and so is the douche up the street insanity, I called to try to get an appointment. I was told, get this, that Very Nice Dermatologist’s next available appointment is in FEBRUARY. I was offered a spot with one of the PA’s but that wouldn’t be until DECEMBER.

this is really an entirely appropriate image considering the douche's insurance is with Progressive and they are totally trying to fuck me around

this is really an entirely appropriate image considering the douche’s insurance is with Progressive and they are totally trying to fuck me around

FOR FUCK SAKE, ARE YOU KIDDING ME???

The appointment bitch finally asked why I needed an appointment and when I told her she offered to let me leave a message with someone else who might be able to get me in sooner since this was a legitimate problem. Um yeah, I generally only call doctors for legitimate problems.

I’m now waiting to hear back and I must say, I’m not pleased.

prompted post

Would you work for someone who stresses you out even if the money was good?

I decided to roll with this one this morning because it’s a subject that’s actually quite near and dear to me.

My first job when I graduated with my Bachelor’s degree was doing phone-based tech support for a software company who’s product allowed insurance agents to compare rates for potential clients. I enjoyed the challenge and I enjoyed the people I worked with on the team. And I really enjoyed the money.

But it very quickly became apparent that I was a tool for them. They didn’t care if I was happy, they didn’t care if I was feeling valued, and they really didn’t care about what was going on when I wasn’t at work. While I was there Mom had a terrible car accident and had to have surgery on her back. I ended up being the one to take care of her and had to take FMLA to cover my absence. No one there gave a shit.

It got to the point where I was crying every morning before leaving. I was utterly miserable. I decided to start looking for a different job and saw an opening for a position at the IT help desk here at the university. The only “problem” was that the pay was significantly lower. But I applied, interviewed, and ended up taking the job.

I’ve never regretted it.

When my mental health issues finally came to a head, I had support from my boss and my colleagues. When I decided to go back to school – both times – I had support from everyone. I’m challenged, I’m valued, and I feel like I’m part of something larger. I love it here.

I could quite easily make way more money working in a corporate environment, but I know that’s not where I belong. I’d much rather be poor and happy than wealthy and miserable.

a glimpse of Mama’s world

2014-10-23 14.41.37As I was standing outside this afternoon taking a quick smoke break it dawned on me that while many of you know I’m in Nebraska the visual for “Nebraska” may be null. I was also struck by how pretty it is here right now. We’re having a proper Indian Summer and it’s been utterly lovely lately. The high temperature today was so warm that I was tempted to have Josh put on the AC in the jeep on the ride home.

Anyway, that’s the view looking to the west from the most eastern building on campus, the one where I spend a few afternoons a week. The building where my actual office is isn’t visible in this shot.

struggling

I’m not doing that well this morning.

1912181_352728494893716_8942037320094095683_nI’ve been getting up a lot earlier to catch my ride with Mom, staying late to catch rides home, trying to stay on top of my school work, trying to get ahead at work, and this fucking antibiotic (that I am STILL taking) is about to kill me.

10449513_899275703430896_2957023684307731292_nJosh did get a message yesterday from the insurance company saying that they had decided it’s the other guy’s fault and that his insurance will pay for it, they just don’t know when. But if we’d like to pay our deductible now and have it fixed, they’ll go after him and get our money back. Eventually.

unnamedI’m thinking NO.

Anyway, I got the homework done that I could last night and I got some things at home organized, so that helped. Right now I’m just trying real hard not to hurl. Did I mention that these pills are going to kill me?

h856C1A76ETA:  When in doubt, go ahead and barf, you’ll feel better.

prompted post

“Is there an opposite to real love?”

As a woman who is on husband #3 and has had countless male companions over the years, I can honestly say that I know what hate feels like. And I know that hate isn’t worth it. That’s like taking poison and expecting the other person to die – it just doesn’t work. Hating someone just lets them live in your head, rent free, and makes you physically ill.

No, not worth it.

But is hate the opposite of love? I would say no, it’s not. However, there is an opposite, at least in my mind there is.

Indifference.

progress, ah yes, beautiful progress

10307168_925204954173180_6310992233200373055_nI have been a woman on a mission lately, hence the “guest” post from Evie Cat yesterday. We’re still fucking around with the car accident mess and the douchenozzle’s insurance company is giving me the run around, so we only have one vehicle. This means I’m riding to work with Mom and getting here at 6:30am. I don’t mind actually, it gives me more time to get stuff done before anyone else arrives. Tonight has the potential for being interesting as Josh has school and doesn’t have time to pick me up and make it there on time, so I’m going to see if one of the gals I work with, who lives in the neighborhood next to ours, can take me home tonight. If not, I’ll wait here at the office until 6 when Mom can get me. And I don’t mind that either because I have the stuff I need to do homework with me and a knitting project.

Last night I spent about 2 hours working on jewelry/care package projects. I’m still working out a few of the details, but I’m making progress so that’s good. I want to have everything done when I get paid again next week so that I can get everything sent off.

10347233_628960707202152_5729503734512741507_nI’ve also been rocking it at work. I got totally caught up with my email and voice mail messages yesterday, I got 3 posts written for our blog, got my office cleaned back up, started lining up dates and times for my spring training classes and got the registration links setup, and printed some materials so I can write more blog posts. Mama is a busy girl.

10540833_881279355226410_2961674759410414683_nI’ll be able to enroll for the Spring semester on November 4, so I started looking for a class yesterday. Fortunately I’m to the point where the Wicked Bitch prof won’t be required. I found two that are listed as approved electives that sound really interesting. The best part is that I’d be home by 6pm.

a96b33f431ef3c545712b1392418e71f473e5641982f3901f15a41b5d416fdb7That’s about all I know for now. I have one thing left from yesterday that I didn’t get done that I want to – assembling the star lamp that I picked up at Ikea. It frightens me that it came in a flat box. Hopefully I can do this without killing myself.