pardon me, are those titties still under warranty?

No, I’m not quite entirely crazy yet. But I’m working on it. What I’ve not been able to work on is any of my goals. And that sucks, but it is what it is.

2014-08-09 01.13.02These last two days have been just… Just… FUCK, I don’t even have the right kind of English to describe it. Non-stop, hard core, intense, draining, ridiculous – all of those and then some. Yesterday there was no time to eat at work – at all. Today the only reason I got lunch was because K and I were doing part of a demo thing for a group and they had lunch catered and invited us to join them.

2014-08-19 00.38.02And these people, HOLY FUCKING HELL, these people just keep coming up with bigger and dumber ways to fuck shit up. It’s just not funny anymore. I feel like I need a tazer or something. And it’s not over. But I do have something funny (funny to me anyway) to share to make up for the fact that I will most likely be a terrible slacker this week in terms of posting shit and doing anything towards meeting my goals.

money-making-fake-boobsMy sister has fake boobs and one of them popped. Not only that, but evidently the damn things are so prone to popping that they come with a 10 year warranty. No, that picture is not my sister and no, her boobs aren’t that big. But still, you get the idea. I find this funny, even though it means I am even more likely to end up going straight to hell while wearing gasoline panties. To help offset this transgression, I offer you this…

2014-08-19 19.11.09Yes, I was holding 2 full beverages, a 2 quart bottle of tea, my Wonder Woman bottle and a Wonder Woman cup. Mama requires much hydration. And funky pants. Don’t judge.


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building rome – weekly update

reach for the starsWell now, THAT SUCKED. *sigh*

Ok, let’s be fair and look at what was going on last week. I had:

  • 9 classes that I taught – they all went well, but that was incredibly tiring, both physically and emotionally
  • a demo on Saturday with my boss which went a little less amazing than I had hoped it would
  • a car accident
  • Mom’s birthday, which meant dealing with my sister, who was diagnosed with shingles over the weekend – she’s bitchy enough as it is, but when she’s sick she’s damn near impossible to be around
  • Josh’s final exam was Thursday night, which meant that he went to school on Tuesday, Wednesday, AND Thursday to get everything done
  • I caught the bank out in a $50 error in their favor which resulted in an overdraft which lead to a $28 fee, all of which had to be corrected

So it’s really no big surprise that the specific things I said I wanted to do, didn’t really happen like I wanted them to happen. I did get my Cartoon Challenge drawing done and I’m really proud of it. I spent a little time on Saturday coloring with my niece. And I have selected a pattern to start knitting next. So all of that was good. I also spent a fair amount of time thinking about my longer term goals and how I might approach that project.

Treadmill? What treadmill?

Anyway, if doing this kind goal setting thing sounds like your cup of tea, join the Building Rome crew. It’s a totally awesome thing and really quite helpful.

The semester starts on the 25th. This week is also going to be mostly hellish, so I’m going to try to take it easy on myself. I’m going to need all of the stress management help I can get. Here’s what I’m going to try this week:

  • Start the new knitting project. This does need to be more than just getting out the yarn and needles – I need to at least cast on and get the first 2 rows done.
  • Read for a bit every night before bed. I can’t really say how long because some nights it makes me sleepy very fast.
  • Do something creative/crafty every day. This can include the Cartoon Challenge entry, knitting, coloring, origami, or sketching. Pretty much anything will count.


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a tiny message from the tiny mommy

thank-you-for-happy-birthday-wishes-colorful-graphicMom asked me to say thank you to everyone who left her a birthday wish. We had a nice time, some really good food, and got to see the cutest little people ever. Pardon me for not writing a whole lot else yet, I made the mistake of sharing several pitchers of margaritas with H and Josh last night and I’m not entirely awake.

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the cutest toothless princess, and PS – Mom isn’t really 21 ;)

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thank GAWD that’s over

sleepyThat was Evie Cat just a few minutes ago, and that’s pretty well how I feel. I am done and I need to sprawl for a nap. And yes, I will twitch my toes.

I had an opportunity to catch up with my boss again today before leaving and she said, again, that she had heard nothing but good things about all of the classes. The pain in the ass, S, said in front of our boss that she’s never in all her many years of doing corporate training seen anyone with the kind of stamina that I have. She also mentioned how at ease I am in front of a class.

Yes, bitches, I am a NATURAL. Suck it.

2014-08-04 20.47.47I want to thank y’all for hanging with me this week and helping keep me sane. Knowing that I had lots and lots of people I could reach out to and call upon was a huge comfort.

10343013_10152505536129656_5038936693493272624_nBut I’m really glad I don’t have to deal with the work people again for a few days. I’ll be going in tomorrow morning for about half an hour to do a demo, but that’s a cake walk in comparison to what was going on this last week.


I mentioned the other night that Josh had eaten all of the ice cream. He’s also eaten all of the cookies and all of my good crackers. I didn’t stop on the way home to get lunch because I figured I’d have lots of options here. Yeah, not so much. I ended up with frozen lasagna. There’s kind of a gigantic fucking mess down here and I really don’t care. I’m exhausted.

little flower dividerTomorrow is the cutest tiny little mommy’s birthday. We’re all (including my sister’s family) going out for Mexican food for dinner and then coming back here for cake and ice cream. H is already kind of being a shit about it. So anyway, if you wouldn’t mind, would you wish her happy birthday in the comments? She’ll be 21 years old. ;)

who wouldn't want to be her? she's adorable! and, just for the record, I really do own more shirts than just this one

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creative Friday – or – Mama gives a twofer

through the lensLife Through the Lens is a photo/drawing challenge thing that Diana and I organized. (mostly Diana – I just make banners) The theme for this first week is “fear.” And unfortunately, which image to use was easy for me. This isn’t one that I took, but I’m in it, so I’m going to call that close enough.

me and my dad, Thanksgiving 2008 (I think)

me and my dad, Thanksgiving 2008 (I think)

My dad died in February 2012 of a very aggressive, very nasty form of cancer. By the time he had a diagnosis it was too late. There was nothing to do but make him comfortable and pray like hell that he didn’t linger too long.

In all the times I’ve tried to take my own life I’ve never felt fear. All of the car accidents, all of the near misses, all of the other shitty things that I’ve brought on myself – I never once felt fear. But when my dad got sick, I was petrified.

I miss him, a lot. He was a great dad and I always knew that he loved me and was proud of me. I’m still doing my best to make him proud. (you too, Mom)

Now, let’s not all be all bummed out because it’s time for…

cartoon-craziness-challenge-bannerIn all reality, I had no idea where the hell else to stick this post this week, so there ya go. The theme for this week was “memories of a childhood vacation.” My first thought when Juls and I discussed this was, “how in the fuck am I supposed to draw shit that I don’t remember?” (I remember very little of being a small person for some reason. I blame the drugs. And the Lithium.)

And then I remembered the vacation my sister and I took with my dad’s parents when I was about 11, maybe. It was very eye opening. We drove from here – middle of the country, literally – out to the east coast to visit my uncle and his family who lived in Maryland, near DC. DROVE there. And my grandfather was a shitty fucking driver even then. Motion sickness galore.

Anyway, my favorite memory from that trip was the day we went to the beach. We all got sunburned as fuck, plenty of sand in our bathing suits and butt cracks, and on the way home we stopped at a roadside vendor and bought several large paper grocery sacks of freshly steamed Maryland Blue Crabs. My aunt covered the patio table with newspaper, we stayed in our bathing suits, and dug in.

Somewhere I posses a photo of the carnage – it was EPIC. Nothing on this earth have I encountered that is as delicious as freshly steamed Maryland Blue Crab eaten right out of the shell with your bare hands while wearing your still wet bathing suit. Nothing.

That is my homage to the Maryland Blue Crab. May he ever be tasty.

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And now, because it’s Friday, here’s a random funny…

2014-08-11 16.46.03

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in the throes of thursday

2014-08-06 17.58.02Holy hell, 8 classes down, only one left to go. FUCK YEAH!

So last night I really and truly didn’t do anything creative, but that’s ok. I did manage to read my book for a bit before crashing. How stupid does it sound when I say that I had somehow managed to forget how much I love to read? Honestly though, I really need to keep this up.

I went and talked to K first thing this morning about what’s been going on with our boss and she said that the time had to Write the Email. And so I did. I gave a very factual and polite accounting of the week – how the classes have been going, the things I have asked for help with but not gotten, shit which is left unresolved, and an update on my mental AND physical health. I sent it to her and her boss, and I asked K to proof it before I sent it. She said it was perfect.

And that’s how I ended up having lunch with my boss and chatting like old chums.

10514683_300451900132917_233048208452255000_nAt any rate, I was given the blessing to leave tomorrow after the last class, which should be no later than 11:00am given that some moron booked another class immediately after mine. Yay.

Tonight I’m hoping to do… Something. I have no idea what yet. I’m not getting on the treadmill because I’m already entirely too tired and too sore. I’m contemplating drawing, though I may see about getting deeper into the Code Academy thing. I actually know a fair bit about HTML and CSS already, but I want to work on improving my skills – you know, just in case I decide to jump ship and need to look for a new job.

retirement plan

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mood music

mental health bannerMusic can do a lot to help, or hinder, my moods. It has also been known to enhance my productivity, both at work and at home. Music actually does a lot of things for me, except put me in The Mood. (never have figured that one out)

Pissed Off

Something best played loud, with a good beat – doesn’t even need words. My all time favorite song to listen to when I good and pissed is “Because I’m Awesome” by The Dollyrots. Just something about Kelly’s voice and the lyrics, works every time. “Gives You Hell” by All American Rejects is another good one.

Stressed Out

I prefer something more towards the instrumental side when I’m stressed. Scale the Summit has an album called “The Migration” that is amazing, and it’s great when I’m stressed. It’s instrumental metal, but not too heavy. It also makes for really nice background music. I’m also fond of – I know, I’m odd – bagpipe music when I’m stressed. Don’t ask me to explain it.


When I’m happy I’m not really picky EXCEPT that I want something I can sing to. Could be anything from the Steve Miller Band to Van Morrison to Pink to Bowling for Soup to Garth Brooks to Fountains of Wayne… The list goes on. Something with clear lyrics and a nice hook. Van Morrison’s “Brown Eyed Girl” is an all-time favorite that always makes me smile. Of course, so is Georgia Satellite’s “Keep Your Hands to Yourself.”


When I need to get work done, I turn on the tunes. Often it’s something a little less intrusive, more of a background kind of vibe. Mumford & Sons is great for that, as is much of the Celtic music I have. Something that sounds pleasant but doesn’t demand attention.


When I feel like being creative I like to either have total silence or something really funky. Weird Al is perfect for when I feel creative, as is some of the weirder Bowling for Soup, Barenaked Ladies, and Fountains of Wayne.

Those are some of my picks for different moods, how does music affect your moods and what are some your favorites when you’re up/down/sideways?

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